If it was your decision to break up, you will probably be attacked by feelings of doubt and maybe cruelty against your ex, (especially if you still have feelings for her), or, if you are the victim, you may feel you have been wronged and feel the universe has ended.

The reality however, given that there is no going back, is that you must learn how deal with it.

Playing the blame game

You will almost certainly feel the need to dissect the past, to try and understand what went wrong, why it went wrong and whose fault it was. The sad truth is that it doesn’t really matter from the point of view that what is done, is done. There is seldom chance to go back and change things.

However, a postmortem does have some benefits. It affords you the opportunity of discovering exactly what did go wrong, and, if the blame lies with you, and in truth some of it must, it gives you the ability to recognize any faults in your own make-up, and how to change and deal with them going forward, so that you don’t carry the same mistakes, or ignore the same warning signs, in your next relationship.

Get Over it

There must of course be a period of reflection. This gives you the opportunity to understand, and to get to know yourself more completely. However, don’t drag it out, the sooner you can get over it, the better. Sadly there is nothing less alluring than a friend who is wallowing in self pity and doubt.

Try to avoid falling into the trap of dwelling on the good things about the relationship, romanticizing them. This only seeks to obscure the real reasons behind the break-up and will delay the “healing” process.

Physician- Heal Thyself

Only one person can make it right again…..YOU. You are the one who has to live with yourself, and you are the one who will form a new relationship when the time is right. You are the only one who knows why you did what you did, or why or how you contributed to the break-up, so it stands to reason only you can understand and learn.

A Friend in need is a friend indeed

Remember, you still have your friends. A trouble shared is a trouble halved.
It is always good to talk things over with friends, to get an outside perspective on things and to share experiences. Just don’t overdo it. Don’t become the sad little man who could talk of nothing else. Use friendships wisely.

Be a busy bee

The truth of the matter is that is only natural to dwell on things. But in order to avoid becoming unhappy and morose, keep busy. Try and find things to do that will take you mind off your worries, if only for a while. Diversion helps.

Keeping a stiff upper lip

It is really important to keep your dignity, your self esteem. It is all too easy, (especially if your ex has cheated on you), to lose you self-confidence. Be positive. Know that there is nothing wrong with you, that you are still the same person she fell for and that it is her who wanted to try the greener grass. It’s he loss.

Avoid the rebound

It’s very natural to want to hurt your ex, or to simply to seek company and companionship elsewhere. Stop and think. Firstly you won’t be hurting your ex if is she has already decided to end things. It will simply toughen her resolve. Secondly, you are vulnerable, and it is all too easy to start a new relationship for the wrong reasons, a relationship that is ultimately doomed to failure when you recover your composure and find out that you have nothing in common other than a shoulder to cry on. This will lead to hurt to yourself, or to your new partner, when the relationship breaks-up. The very thing you were trying to get over initially.

Put on a brave new face

Breaking-up is tough. The aftermath is tougher still. The doubts, the recriminations, the anger. But, remember, time heals all wounds, so, go out, get busy, indulge your self in your hobbies, reacquaint yourself with your friends, There’s a whole wide world out there waiting for you, and Ms right may be just around the corner.

Delissa Huapi
http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/how-to-get-over-a-breakup-expert-advice-for-men-706874.html

Question About Getting an Ex Back – Does My Ex Want to Get Back Together?

Perhaps you have broken up with your ex and you are now thinking of getting back together with your ex. Maybe you even doubt whether there are still any chances for you to win your ex back.

Well, let’s say this, you cannot be sure that you will definitely get your ex back even if you do all the right things. But if you do all the right things, your chances of getting an ex back is definitely much greater. Of course, you should also avoid all those common mistakes that many men and women made when getting an ex back.

A question that many people have is this, “How do I know if my ex still wants to get back together with me?”

Well, there are no hard and fast rules here but you will want to be more observant here and be active on the lookout for certain signs.

First, is your ex still concern about what is happening to you? The fact is if your ex is no longer interested in getting back together with you, he/she will be indifferent towards what is happening to you.

What does indifferent mean?

Well, it simply means that your ex doesn’t really care what is happening to you now. “So what if you are dating another man/woman? It is none of my concern”

Basically, it means your ex is kind of emotionless towards you. Therefore, you do not want your ex to be indifferent towards you. In fact, you are much better off if your ex is angry with you. Angry means still have feelings. Angry means not being indifferent.

Other things you want to look out for is whether your ex is doing anything “special”. For example, maybe one day, your ex will call you out of the blue.

He/she may say something like, “Hey, I thought you called me, that’s why I calling to check it out.” Basically, your ex will try to find some lame excuses to call you or to talk to you.

All these are possible signs that your ex still want to be back together with you. Of course, these are just signs and that may not necessary mean that your ex still wants to get back together with you as there are many factors involve that may affect the results.

The causes of your break up, your ex’s personality etc are factors that you will want to take into consideration. Generally, the more signs that you see, the more likely it is that your ex wants to get back together with you.

<a href=” http://www.makingupyourlove.info” target=”_blank”>How to get girlfriend back together</a>?

Watch a video that shows you exactly what you must NEVER do, what you should do to get your ex back and why at <a href=” http://www.squidoo.com/how_can_i_retrieve_my_ex_lover_back” target=”_blank”>How To Get Girlfriend Back Together Video</a>

You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.

allan lim usa
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/question-about-getting-an-ex-back-does-my-ex-want-to-get-back-together-697979.html